Niko looked at her and sighed. "I wish that by now you could trust me."
She looked out through the cave entrance, at the clouds. "Everyone I ever trusted sent me away," she said flatly.
For a while he said nothing. Tris, glancing at him, saw a look of pity that made her blush with embarrassment. At last he reached over, squeezed her fingers, and let go. "Then I will just have to hope that you change your mind someday. In the meantime, you're going to learn meditation."
"Why?" she demanded. "The others don't have to."
"They start tomorrow. As for you, why now?" His eyes held hers; she tried to look away, and couldn't.
"Things happen when you get angry, Tris. First hail, now lightning - if you don't learn to control yourself, you will kill someone."
She felt like there wasn't enough air to breathe. Was he saying she was possessed by a spirit, or not entirely human, as they'd thought back in Capchen? There were people who attracted spirits they couldn't control - every child knew those stories. She didn't want to spend the rest of her life in a cage. "How do you know?"
"Do you know we mages choose the name we bear, once we are trained?"
She shook her head.
"We do. My last name is 'Goldeye.' It means that I see things that are hidden to most people. That's how I know. And I tell you this. If you learn to meditate - if you learn to control your mind - you will be able to keep things from happening when you are upset."
She tore her glance away from his and clenched her hands. A chance to stop people blaming her for what she couldn't help? "What do I do?" she croaked.
Age 10: Her first hope of control
She looked out through the cave entrance, at the clouds. "Everyone I ever trusted sent me away," she said flatly.
For a while he said nothing. Tris, glancing at him, saw a look of pity that made her blush with embarrassment. At last he reached over, squeezed her fingers, and let go. "Then I will just have to hope that you change your mind someday. In the meantime, you're going to learn meditation."
"Why?" she demanded. "The others don't have to."
"They start tomorrow. As for you, why now?" His eyes held hers; she tried to look away, and couldn't.
"Things happen when you get angry, Tris. First hail, now lightning - if you don't learn to control yourself, you will kill someone."
She felt like there wasn't enough air to breathe. Was he saying she was possessed by a spirit, or not entirely human, as they'd thought back in Capchen? There were people who attracted spirits they couldn't control - every child knew those stories. She didn't want to spend the rest of her life in a cage. "How do you know?"
"Do you know we mages choose the name we bear, once we are trained?"
She shook her head.
"We do. My last name is 'Goldeye.' It means that I see things that are hidden to most people. That's how I know. And I tell you this. If you learn to meditate - if you learn to control your mind - you will be able to keep things from happening when you are upset."
She tore her glance away from his and clenched her hands. A chance to stop people blaming her for what she couldn't help? "What do I do?" she croaked.