stormandwind | INBOX: lastvoyages

Tris nods, because her surprise at anything he said is mild at most. She appreciates the blatant honesty.

"I couldn't escape the theoretical part of it. You know I'm connected to the wind. Did I ever tell you that I hear sounds and voices on it? Things the wind passed over before it reaches me. I've been overhearing people's private conversations for as long as I can remember, and I didn't know how to stop hearing them when I was younger." Control, fortunately, came with training. "I hate feeling unprepared for anything, so I supplemented with books on the Barge before actually taking anyone to bed."

And it's still just been the one person, who was somehow even less experienced than Tris's complete lack of experience made her.

"Do you want to know? Theoretically, or," she pauses, swallows, and forces herself to keep meeting his gaze as she finishes, her face flushing brighter again, "practically?"

"That sounds very useful now that you can control it." He can see how it would have been difficult when she was young and didn't understand it, but now he just sees the tactical advantage.

"There are books on having sex?" He sounds absolutely floored by this idea... that people would write about how to have sex. Partially because it's easier for the moment than acknowledging how floored he is by the fact that... he's almost positive she's propositioning him. But only almost. And oh kriff he wants it if she is... but he has no idea what you do with a female. And the idea of failing at it somehow is a bit stomach-churning. But-

"Practically?" He's not blushing, he's not embarrassed per se, but he is anxious and uncertain and his voice is a rough croak.

"There are books on just about everything," Tris tells him, grinning. Her role as Barge librarian has never included this topic of discussion before. If the genres have come up, it's never been quite so... immediate and personal. "Including a range that spans from basic anatomy textbooks to erotic fiction novels."

Even books don't hold her attention right now, though. She can elaborate later, and find him books if he wants any.

In the meantime, Tris takes a deep, steadying breath, and she nods. Her voice is just the slightest bit breathless, noticeable if he's paying very close attention. "We could. I think I'd like to, if you would. I don't mind answering questions before. Or any other time." Including during.

"... oh." He'd just never even considered that. Books. On sex. He's really not interested in books right now, though. Not with Tris sitting there like that, flushed and breathless, and oh Force... he thinks he might be as hard as plasteel at just the thought, and he pushes the heel of his hand down against the head of his cock through his jeans.

"I-" His voice breaks completely and now he's flushed, though it's more with arousal than anything else, and his breathing is decidedly uneven. "I'd, uh, I'd... I'd like that. A lot. If you're sure?"

Her eyes follow the movement of his hand, and her breath hitches audibly as Tris contemplates the prospect of touching him herself. She can't help the grin that flashes across her face at the words that follow it.

She could give him a simple response, but he told her emphatically how attractive she is. He deserves the same. Her answer is simultaneously breathy and utterly determined. "Fives. You're clever and resilient and eager to learn. You care fiercely about helping children who have never been protected or cared for properly. And," she lets her gaze roam down his body again. "I wouldn't care about this if I didn't trust you, but look at you. Yes, I'm sure."

Tris raises a hand to the back of his neck again and leans over to kiss him. Gently at first, but it certainly doesn't need to stay that way.

Edited 2018-09-07 14:52 (UTC)

It's her first words that make him smile almost shyly and flush with pleasure, because it's those things, about him as an individual, his choices and priorities, that matter to him, and having them explicitly recognized and appreciated is still strange and exciting. His appearance is something he shares with millions of brothers, and being physically attractive is preferable to being repulsive, but he has little control over it and so little pride in it.

It's her touch that sets his heart hammering, though, gentle and familiar, but with the intent behind it it's as arousing now as it is comforting, and he leans in eagerly to kiss her. He's still anxious, has absolutely no idea where he may or may not be allowed to touch, or how aggressive to be. And so he lets her lead, keeping it slow and careful for now, and his hand hovers uncertainly in the air between them for a moment before he settles it cautiously at her waist. He's in no rush, he doesn't want to screw this up.

He deserves to have those things appreciated regardless, but the fact that he shares his appearance with millions of people makes it all the more important to tell him. Tris never wants Fives, of all people, to think she's attracted to him for his looks. He isn't interchangeable.

After she's already agreed to sleep with him, he doesn't have to be quite so careful where he puts his hands, but Tris isn't rushing either. Not with how anxious he was about the idea of sex. She does settle back comfortably onto the ground though, pulling Fives with her. Tris smiles against his lips for an instant before she opens her mouth to tangle her tongue with his.

It's been nearly a year since Tris kissed anyone as herself rather than in a breach. And if she's honest, she's wanted to kiss Fives for months.

Fives follows her down eagerly, though he's careful about supporting his own weight--she's so much smaller than anyone he's ever touched like this before. The feel of her beneath him is amazing, though, soft and giving and he groans into the kiss at the feel of her breasts against his chest.

The kiss is much softer as well, he finds, with no stubble to catch against his, and he lifts his hand reflexively from her waist to cup her cheek in fascination. It's so smooth, and his thumb traces along her cheekbone while his fingers brush at the delicate shell of her ear as he licks delicately into her mouth. He's so careful about everything, so concerned not to hurt her and so clueless about what might.

It isn't so much the feel of him that gets to Tris as the sound he makes. Her free arm slides around Fives' waist immediately at that groan, tightening reflexively to hold him against her. She'd appreciate some of his weight on her, actually, though she also appreciates him considerately not crushing the air from her lungs.

Tris doesn't mind gentle. She's perfectly willing to let Fives set the tone right now. She doesn't realize, yet, how worried he is that she might break.

The hand on his neck shifts slightly so that Tris can run her thumb along his jawline as she kisses him slowly.

When she pulls him down by his waist he does finally settle some of his weight carefully on her, then groans again at the feel of his erection pressing against her thigh. Force, she's so tiny, she even makes Jedao seem broad and tall by comparison, and it's both exciting and intimidating. She must be so much more delicate, so much easier to hurt, no matter how powerful she is in other ways.

But she feels so kriffing good, soft yet solid beneath him, and he finally dares to let his free hand roam a little. Down her side, to the unfamiliar swell of her hip, the softness of her thigh under layers and layers of petticoats. Then up again, to cautiously caress the side of her breast. He can't keep back another groan at that, and his hips stutter against her, his erection dragging at her thigh again.

The weight of him on top of her is as solid and reassuring as it is arousing. Touch and affection still feel like a foreign language she's scrambling to speak fluently as often as not, but Fives has been wrapping himself around her for months. It's surprisingly easy to take a step past that, without any of her usual moments of hesitation.

Tris hums appreciatively into his mouth as Fives runs his hand over her side, then gasps as his hips move and he touches her breast. She shifts her leg, pressing up into him.

Her hand slips below his shirt and Tris splays warm fingers on his lower back. In spite of the pressure of her thigh between his legs, there's nothing hurried or frantic about the movement. Tris just wants to feel skin rather than fabric.

It's so different from the feel of Jedao or Clark or one of his brothers under him. She's so much smaller, and softer, and then hand splayed over the skin of his back feels tiny and delicate. It's amazing and disorienting and exciting and terrifying... and he wishes he could feel bare skin in turn, but he has no idea where to even start to accomplish that, with all the layers Tris is wearing.

He does pull away a little to work his hand between them, to brush over the spot where he thinks, perhaps, her nipple might be under her dress, though he's not sure if that will be sensitive for her or not. He's not sure what he should do at all, honestly, beyond the kissing, which is really kriffing nice on its own, the feel of her leg pressed against him, giving him something solid to rock against, is amazing, and he'd like to return the favor. Except... she doesn't have a cock and he's not at all sure what she does have that might be sensitive in turn.

The thought's embarrassing and frustrating and he breaks the kiss to look down at her, flushed and a little breathless. "I... what... um... I don't know... where to touch," he mumbles. "What to, uh... to do for you."

He isn't making bad guesses, and Tris arches into Fives' hand when he rubs at her nipple through her dress. "Breasts," she confirms, her breath ragged between words, "are good. There's a spot between my legs that I can point out specifically once we're out of our clothes. General area is enough for the time being. But I think you could touch me anywhere you want and I'd be delighted right now."

He isn't the only person with some concerns about the current situation. Tris kisses the corner of Fives' mouth before she adds hers.

"If you want to have sex now," she tells him, still struggling to catch her breath, "We should move to my room before this goes further. I... this is the first time that you've had to worry about getting anyone pregnant, but it's been long enough since I last had sex that I haven't taken medicine to prevent pregnancy. I need to get something."

Tris has no idea whether it's even possible to become pregnant on the Barge. The fact that she isn't aging would seem to suggest not, but she believes in preparation and precautions whenever possible. Sex is no exception.

...She'll explain pregnancy if she has to. She hopes he's at least aware of that much.

"They're very good," he agrees more than a bit raggedly himself, and he thumbs experimentally at her nipple again. The softness under his hand is fascinating. Still, he shifts his hand lower at her words, callouses occasionally catching at the fabric of her dress as he slides it over the equally delightful and unfamiliar softness of her belly, and then finds the apex of her thighs as best he can through the layers of dress and petticoats.

It's... almost distressingly strange to feel nothing there, no cock be it hard or soft, no heft of a man's balls, though he's known for quite some time that there wouldn't be. It's still startling to feel first hand, but also... curious, and he presses, lightly, experimentally, wondering just what spot and what motion might be correct.

He's derailed from the entire idea of exploration by her next words, though, and he draws back with a hitched breath. "I-" He presses his lips together, swallows, wonders why the very suggestion of it hits him so hard. "I don't even know if we can," he finally admits. "Get someone pregnant, I mean." He does, at least, have a somewhat rudimentary grasp of the natural order of things, though a great deal of it is, in fact, from breach memories.

"So, uh... yeah. Just in case. That... it would be-" He stops, a little strangled, a lot flushed. Both by the prospect of actually having sex. With a woman. And the previously completely unconsidered question of whether he ever could father a child. He doesn't have the first idea what to make of the complex stew of emotions they both bring up, so he shoves them determinedly away. "I'd like... if you want to."

Tris groans at his thumb on her breast, shivers as his hand shifts lower, and shifts her hips against his hand.

Then she goes utterly still when he draws back, because that possibility hadn't actually occurred to her until he said it. It seems sickeningly plausible. Of course he doesn't know, unless Fives was ever privy to files on what the Kaminoans did to him and all of his brothers. And why would he be? They considered him an object, not a person. He never had the right of information or consent for their manipulations. Tris reaches down to take his hand, tilts her head up to rest her forehead against his.

"I'm not sure anyone can on the Barge. I just prefer to be careful." And... she can't quite bring herself to leave the rest of it unaddressed, even if Fives tries to. She kisses him once, quick and fierce with the edge of her anger at everyone involved in creating him. "You'll have more children than you know what to do with once you leave, and biology is the least important part of what makes a family."

Fives knows what her birth family was like, and how important the family that found and chose her is by comparison. He knows that she gave up her name to choose one that she could share with someone who loved her instead. Those words are anything but empty, coming from Tris.

"No, it's... don't worry, I know," he assures her quickly, even though he does feel some small, irrational sense of distress at the thought. Really, he should just be grateful that no one had thought it would be more efficient to make them sexually nonfunctional at all, regardless of whether they're sterile or not.

He smiles at her, and while there's a faint edge of discomfort to it it's still warm, and soft, and hopeful. "Being careful is important, and we will have more children than we know what to do with." Because he always thinks of that future in terms of we. Of him and Jedao and the vod'ike they're going to rescue. Who needs more family than that?

He has every right to feel distressed by that, and Tris can tell that the thought will stick with him for awhile. Watching the soft smile bloom on his face afterward is a reassurance that at least she said the best thing that could be said, under the circumstances. She squeezes his hand.

"I'm glad they have you and Jedao fighting for them, and determined to make sure they're cared for after," she tells him sincerely, kissing Fives more gently this time.

The thought will stick, no matter how much he tells himself it's irrelevant. It's just one more thing about himself he has no real knowledge of or control over, much less important than their rapid aging, or the chips, or their slavery. Jedao's been sterilized by choice, it just means one thing he doesn't have to worry about if it's the case, and he wonders, vaguely, if he should find out... then pushes it ruthlessly aside again.

It doesn't matter, but especially not here and now, with Tris's lips against his and the sweet solidity of her against him. He wraps his arms around her and holds her close, kisses her slow and sweet and deep, and makes a quiet sound of satisfaction.

Tris tightens one arm around Fives again as he deepens the kiss, cradling the back of his head with her other hand. She melts against him. This kiss is thorough and sincere in a way that makes her feel safe and comfortable as much as it makes her want to get him into bed.

When she finally needs air, Tris scarcely moves away at all. She just asks breathlessly, her lips brushing against his once or twice, "Should we go now? We can do, or not do, whatever you'd like, but we have more options if we move to my cabin."

Even setting aside the matter of protection, she isn't actually comfortable getting out of any of her clothes in a public part of the ship. Not even the Enclosure.

Fives presses their foreheads together, smiling against her lips. He's too engrossed in her just now to let any of the rest of it intrude again and ruin this moment. "Definitely."

He kisses her again, just a short sweet peck to her lips and then her nose and forehead, with a playfulness that he's learned from Jedao, and then without waiting he swings his leg back over her so he can crouch at her side, slips his arms under her at shoulders and knees, and stands, lifting her with him with a broad smile and no apparent effort. That's another thing he's learned from Jedao, who adores being manhandled.

"Oh," Tris blushes as Fives lifts her, though her arm wraps around his shoulders instinctively. There's something intensely uncomfortable about the vulnerability and dependence inherent in letting anyone carry her. Particularly publicly. She's never allowed that unless she was injured, exhausted, or death tolling. Tris doesn't intend to make a secret of anything that happens between her and Fives, but every instinct she has tells her to walk to her cabin on her own two feet.

She knows, though, that it's mostly stubbornness and pride. Those do no one any good, least of all her. She'll try to get over them. And if she's going to freeze up, she owes Fives an explanation.

"I," she says, haltingly, "I like you holding me. I'm self sufficient to the point of stubbornness, though. I don't mind you carrying me back to my room today, but I'd rather you don't pick me up in the future unless I really can't walk. In public, at least. When we're alone, go ahead."

Being vulnerable around Fives is alright. Being potentially vulnerable around anyone on board is rather a different matter, even if she knows logically that this is a silly place to draw that line.

One advantage to being held where she is right now, at least, is that she's very conveniently placed to lean in a few inches and kiss the side of Fives' neck.

He notices the freezing, of course, and listens solemnly to her explanation... and then beams at the kiss to the side of his neck. "How about if I just do this, then?" he asks, and laughs as he abruptly spins around and around in a circle so her hair and her dress, where it drapes over his arm, fly out. He's still laughing when he stops, and he ducks his head to kiss the tip of her nose.

"I think I like making you blush," he confesses. "And I like being able to hold you, too, but I don't need to carry you, especially not if it makes you uncomfortable." Which doesn't mean he puts her down right this second. "You're... a very nice armful," he informs her happily, and squeezes her just a bit.

It's frankly impossible to avoid smiling when Fives laughs that way, genuine and joyful. It's been a long time since she heard or saw Fives this happy, and it's deeply reassuring.

She isn't going to stop blushing anytime soon, so he can keep enjoying that reaction. She hides her face momentarily by kissing his neck again, though, then bites his earlobe lightly.

"I'm still not used to people picking me up like I weigh nothing," Tris points out, managing a sincere grin on that because Fives has the kind of happiness that would be infectious even if she weren't delighted on her own behalf. "You have a wonderful smile, by the way."

Giving compliments doesn't come easily, but she tries.

He tips his head a little when she kisses his neck again, rubbing his bristly cheek against her temple, and his eyes slip shut for a moment when she nips at his earlobe. "But you're so little," he points out, and bounces her lightly in his arms, grinning down at her.

It's not that he doesn't understand she's fat, he just doesn't see it as a problem. Her role isn't to be in top physical form for active combat, her power lies elsewhere and she could best him without so much as raising a hand, so why should she worry about it? Especially when her curves are so nice and she feels so comfortably squishy this way.

It's his turn to blush at the compliment, and he tips his head again, this time to give her a proper kiss, slow and deep and warm, because he doesn't really know what to do with the compliment and this seems like a nice compromise. Then he gives her one more teasing kiss to the tip of her nose and sets her gently down. "Ready to go?"

"I'm short, not little. There's a difference. You're also stronger than most humans," Tris tells him with a small huff of laughter brought on more by his endearing enthusiasm than by anything being said.

His response to compliments is pretty much exactly what hers would be, so it works well enough. She and Hope talked awhile ago, though, about how difficult it is to put feelings into words, and how important it is to make an attempt in spite of that. Both of them would much rather fling themselves into other forms of affection than try to verbally express emotions. Or try to give or respond to compliments, in Tris's case. She's doing her best to overcome that.

Kissing is easier, and Tris has already confirmed that she thoroughly enjoys kissing Fives.

She wraps her arms around him for a few seconds when he puts her down, pressed tightly up against him, before she pulls away almost reluctantly to reply, "Now I am."

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